What's going on...

Not much is going on...but at least I'm writing again right?

Ok maybe not so much...

Here's the thing...I got to see one of my friends today and it was great seeing her. She is going to have surgery on Friday. She has breast cancer and they found it in time...and they are getting it out. I'm just scared for her. I really don't want to get a phone call from her husband again like I did when she had a stroke. So I'm kind of down...and scared out of my freaking mind! If anything happens...I know myself well enough that I'll probably break down even worse than what I did with my dad. I mean to tell you...I completely broke down and died inside when my dad passed away.

I'm not going to lie... I love God, but right now I'm not a fan of Him right now. I know He is watching over me and my family and friends...I've just been so lost that I don't really want to be found and the worse part is that no matter how hard I try to become the person that God wants...He seems to lose me. Granted He hasn't but that's what I feel. People around me don't really know me anymore...and truthfully...I kind of lost myself in a bad way.

So as God and I are on a love/dislike relationship right now...I'll always be HIS daughter even though I feel like sometimes like I'm losing Him. I'm just sayin...and now you know what's going on in the life of a sad 25 year old who is still learning to live in a house without her dad there and thinking about her (mostlikely) best friend as she goes through this crazy phase in life.

I just have to remember love is the most important thing in life. So remember Faith, Hope, LOVE. 1st Corinthians 13:13