Chill

Every time I'm relaxed
And in my own world
I see a message from you
And a a chill
Comes over me
I shiver for hours
I can't control the cold
That comes over me
I just become freezing cold
I can't seem to get warm again
No blanket
No jacket can keep me warm
Nothing
I stay cold
I wish I could be ok
But every time
You send me a message
I become cold
And I shiver
Throughout the night and day

Stupid girl

Why do you let your heart
Give so much?
Why do you even try?
Once was enough
Now twice
Get over it, babe
If he's not willing to fight
Why should you?
Obviously you're too good for him
If you weren't then you'd be
Right by his side
You knew when he texted you again
You would let your heart
Take control
Why did you even try?
Hoping something will change?
Hoping he'll actually be a man
And step up to the plate?
He's not worth it
If he's not going to try
No girl should be kept a secret
I know you love him still
But this time...
You need to let him go
Don't be a stupid girl
And let him walk all over you
Be proud of the fact
That he missed his chance
And be patient for the one
That's willing to be by your side
Who will take you out
Who isn't afraid of your past
And the baggage that you put on the table
Please don't be that stupid girl
That I know you'll become again
As soon as he texts you
Or when you see him again

What to do?

Is it bad to love someone who doesn't really want to be loved by you? Stupid question or odd question I know. But somehow I have liked this guy for awhile now...and he keeps saying he's not ready to be in a relationship, now I can understand that but wouldn't it be better if we hung out with friends so we could become better friends and when he's ready he'll be ready? I don't know... I'm such a girl....
I just don't want to be thrown away like I have been before... Sometimes I wonder if it's even worth the hurt to let him in... Oh wait too late the idiot in myself already did.